Turns Out I’m Crazy

A young girl bravely pursuing a boy she likes isn’t harmful in any way.
At the very least, Chen Qianqing didn’t mind it.
His strategy was to prevent them from getting close to him.

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It was also funny that he only felt one emotion when faced with those who were favorably looked upon by Chen Qianqing: jealousy.
That’s right! Jealousy.
He was jealous of those who could get close to Chen Qianqing and even be thought highly of, this because it was something he himself couldn’t attain.

 

Therefore, when Li Feiyue approached him to have him join the New Year’s party, his mood turned sour.
He looked at the pretty girl in front of him and, without the slightest hesitation, refused her request yet again.

 

Li Feiyue was their class representative, she was beautiful, her family situation quite good.
In addition to that, she was a member of the student union and she had never hit a snag ever since she got into university.
When she’d asked Chen Qianqing to perform at the freshmen’s party the year before, he had agreed.

 

For the most part, young people like being in the spotlight.

If the real Chen Qianqing were the one being asked, he would be pushed to agree.
However, the current Chen Qianqing was as stubborn as a rock.
No matter what Li Feiyue could come up with, Chen Qianqing wouldn’t agree.

 

Seeing that Chen Qianqing wasn’t going to agree, Li Feiyue got nervous.
“Chen Qianqing, don’t be so stubborn! We’re classmates, why would you embarrass me like this?”

 

Because Chen Qianqing wasn’t planning to go back home, he’d let Zhu Mao leave first.
At that moment, besides himself, there was Li Feiyue and a classmate he didn’t know the name of.
Therefore, when he heard Li Feiyue say that, Chen Qianqing lifted his wrist and checked his watch.
“I’m not joining, find someone else.
I have something to do, so I’m leaving first.”

 

“Chen Qianqing!” Li Feiyue was truly annoyed now.
She grabbed Chen Qianqing’s hand and told him, “If you won’t give me face, at least give Yueyi face!” She looked at the girl who wasn’t talking.

 

Xiong Yueyi heard that and replied softly, “Feiyue, if he doesn’t want to do it, forget it.
It looks like Qianqing really doesn’t want to.”

 

Li Feiyue snorted and still refused to let him go.
“He’s just a pretentious prick.
Chen Qianqing, I’ll ask you one last time, will you do it or not?”

 

Chen Qianqing shook off her hand, and without looking back, he left.
Could he let these people grab his hand?! He himself hadn’t held it enough!

 

Li Feiyue was so angry that she shouted, “You better not regret this!”

 

Chen Qianqing didn’t answer.
In his lifetime, besides what happened with Chen Qianqing, he had nothing to regret.

 

While walking towards the school gate, he noticed Lu Zhengfei’s parked car waiting for him.
There were also people following him unobtrusively, usually hard to spot.

Chen Qianqing got in the car and looked at Lu Zhengfei, who was sitting inside.

 

It was already November and the weather was becoming colder; Lu Zhengfei wore a thin windbreaker.
When Chen Qianqing entered the car, he questioned, “Why did it take you so long?”

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Chen Qianqing couldn’t fathom why Lu Zhengfei bothered asking despite knowing the answer.
“I encountered delays.”

 

Lu Zhengfei looked him over twice, then moved away.
“Let’s go out on New Year’s.”

 

Chen Qianqing was skeptical.
“You’re not going home to come out of the closet?”

 

When Chen Qianqing mentioned it, Lu Zhengfei felt a little awkward.
He had planned to sincerely disclose what he wanted to do, but then his plans changed.
It would give people the impression that he was beating a retreat.

However, since it was Chen Qianqing who asked, Lu Zhengfei had to explain.
“I think it’s too early.
I’m afraid they might overreact.”

 

The color of Chen Qianqing’s face worsened.
If Lu Zhengfei didn’t go home and out himself, it would be unlikely that he would get locked up.
If that were the case, wouldn’t he be stuck with Lu Zhengfei for the next three years?

 

Lu Zhengfei wasn’t stupid enough to think he minded that they couldn’t make their relationship public.

He asked, “Qianqing, did someone tell you something?” He thought that someone was Ruan Wenhong.

 

Chen Qianqing, “No.”

 

Chen Qianqing was obviously unhappy with the news, but after a moment of silence, he hid his discontent and inquired, “You’re really not going to come out?”

 

Lu Zhengfei stared at him.
“Qianqing, do you want me to?”

 

No answer.

 

Lu Zhengfei, “Or do you want my family to break us up?”

 

Despite being muddled by love, Lu Zhengfei wasn’t stupid.
Putting together Ruan Wenhong’s provocations and Chen Qianqing’s current behavior, everything was clear: he instantly understood what Chen Qianqing meant.
“Chen Qianqing, you know, you belong to me in this life.
You can’t ever leave me.”

 

Chen Qianqing propped up his head and looked out the window, as if he heard nothing.

 

Lu Zhengfei grabbed Chen Qianqing’s face and turned it towards himself.
“Did you hear what I just said?”

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Chen Qianqing’s eyes were cold.
When he looked at Lu Zhengfei, it was as if he was dealing with a practical joke.
After a while, he spoke in a low voice, “What about death?”

 

Lu Zhengfei began to show obvious signs of anger on his face.

 

Chen Qianqing gazed at Lu Zhengfei’s pair of youthful, bright and fiery eyes, speaking leisurely, “Can death take me away from you?”

 

The answer was an unequivocal kiss.

Truth be told, the amount of pressure on Lu Zhengfei was no less than Chen Qianqing’s.
The matters he had to deal with were too many; Ruan Wenhong was also a source of stress.
Yet he still wished to find the time to chaperone Chen Qianqing, because he only needed to see him to feel the corners of his lips rise.

 

Chen Qianqing didn’t move: he allowed Lu Zhengfei to forcefully open his lips, let his tongue enter his mouth, and explore every corner.

 

Lu Zhengfei was really mad.
He knew that Chen Qianqing wasn’t trying to intimidate him; rather, he was coldly telling him the truth.
The person in front of him and the Chen Qianqing that he first met were like two different people.
If Lu Zhengfei hadn’t been constantly by his side, he would fear that someone really swapped his Qianqing for someone else.

 

The earlier Chen Qianqing was full of vigor – instead, the person he was kissing now was like a dignified sculpture carved out of ice.
He didn’t resist but didn’t welcome him either, his silence deathly.

 

Lu Zhengfei suddenly felt distressed and let go.
“Qianqing, no matter how much you change, I will still love you.”

 

Chen Qianqing, “Even if I’m not Chen Qianqing?”

 

Lu Zhengfei, “If you aren’t Chen Qianqing, then who is Chen Qianqing?”

 

This question was a small hit to the soul.
Chen Qianqing laughed, “That’s right, I’m not Chen Qianqing.
Who is Chen Qianqing then?” The Lu Zhengfei who had used a gun to blow out his own brains had died at that time.

 

Lu Zhengfei embraced Chen Qianqing and gently kissed his forehead.
“Qianqing, please accept me.”

 

Chen Qianqing laughed, not saying anything — the answer was already clear.

 

They went home and had dinner.

 

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Lu Zhengfei prepared it all in accordance with Chen Qianqing’s preferences.
In reality, this meal had none of their favorite foods.

 

After dinner, Lu Zhengfei called over a doctor to change the dressing on Chen Qianqing’s hand wounds.
He then went to the bathroom and brought a basin of warm water in front of Chen Qianqing.

 

Chen Qianqing stared at him.
“What are you doing?”

 

Lu Zhengfei, “You can’t touch water yet, I’ll wash your face.”

 

Chen Qianqing, “You can overcome this problem by giving me two plastic gloves.”

 

Lu Zhengfei, “We don’t have any of those here.”

 

Chen Qianqing, “…surely you have plastic bags?”

 

Lu Zhengfei, “I’ve already used all of them.
I’ll have Auntie Zhao buy some tomorrow.”

 

Chen Qianqing looked at him with suspicion.
After a long period of silence, he nonetheless agreed — he couldn’t avoid washing his face.

 

After Lu Zhengfei tested the water temperature, he submerged the towel in the warm water, wrung it out a little, then wiped Chen Qianqing’s face.
His movements were gentle and careful, as if he was scared of hurting him.

 

Chen Qianqing observed Lu Zhengfei’s extremely cautious demeanor.
Who could guess what sort of emotion he felt in his heart?

 

Pity? Hate? Absurdity? Lu Zhengfei’s love was humble, yet the things he had done made people unable to sympathize with him.

 

After washing Chen Qianqing’s face, Lu Zhengfei also fetched water to wash his feet.
Chen Qianqing took off his shoes and let his feet soak in the water.

 

Those feet were very pretty.
All his life he had never labored much, nor did he travel many roads.
The skin was fair and clear, blue-green blood vessels faintly visible.
His toes were nice and round, his toenails a pretty shade of pink, just like shells on a beach.

 

Chen Qianqing washed his feet, while Lu Zhengfei stared at him from the side.
He watched, and watched, then his body reacted.

 

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When Chen Qianqing discovered that a certain part of Lu Zhengfei’s was raised, his entire being felt like laughing in a rage.
He wanted to kick him.
“Lu Zhengfei, do you think you can take advantage of this?”

 

Lu Zhengfei couldn’t help it; it had been almost a month since he last relieved his sexual needs.
He didn’t expect this reaction either.

 

Chen Qianqing gnashed his teeth, “Aren’t you going to solve your own problem?”

 

Lu Zhengfei wore a perfectly innocent expression.
“Qianqing-ah, don’t you know that for me, masturbation counts as cheating? You haven’t cheated, right?”

 

Chen Qianqing, “…”

Did he also say this kind of thing in the past? No.
There was no way he could admit that the shameless person in front of him was just like him!

 

Lu Zhengfei brazenly said, “Qianqing, don’t be mad.
Doesn’t this mean you’re so pretty that I couldn’t endure it anymore?”

 

Chen Qianqing, “But you only saw my fucking feet!”

 

Lu Zhengfei, “Feet can also be pretty.”

 

Chen Qianqing, “…”

 

Lu Zhengfei, “Otherwise, take off your pants and let me see your calf.”

 

Chen Qianqing, “Lu Zhengfei, from what I’m seeing, you really don’t want your toy anymore.”

 

It didn’t look like he was joking around.
Lu Zhengfei was forced to sigh and throw the towel he used to wipe those feet to Chen Qianqing.
“Then go, quickly put socks on.
I fear I may not be able to control myself.”

 

Chen Qianqing, “Get away, get away!” he said while quickly wiping his feet dry and wearing socks.

 

Lu Zhengfei stared for a while, then murmured, “Qianqing, I really like the color of your socks…”

 

Chen Qianqing, “?!”